i've never lost a loved one that i was really close to so i'm not going to even try and compare this to that but i feel the closest i've gotten is losing gymnastics. it feels like just yesterday i was walking out of the doctor’s office in denial of what was even happening it wasn't until i had reach the gym and started to tell my team and coaches that i was done forever when it really hit. i remember the next couple of weeks of my life were possibly the lowest i've ever been. i had surgery and things stayed to same. i started to get involved in other things and slowly the pain started to go away nothing could replace gymnastics but i found other things that i enjoyed that started to help my come out of my whole. life started to look up again. i was truly happy and everything seemed to be good.
Last year after getting permission from the doctor i tried out for the cheer team. i made it and it was the closest i had gotten to filling the whole of gymnastics. everything seemed to be going well until the middle of the season. i started noticing my elbow more and the pain grew with each day. i again returned to the doctor and it was decided i would need surgery at the end of the season. i went through the rest of the cheer season living on pain medication, ice, and pure mental toughness. i had surgery again and started to my recovery. i tried out for the team again hoping for another year just like the last. i made the team and things were good. as practices started to pick up again my elbow sure enough started to hurt. for a while i hoped it was just pain from not doing anything on it for so long but as time went on it began to appear the pain was not going away. to the doctors i went and the bad news kept rolling in i had to quite the cheer team and surgery would be needed again. another door had closed in my life.
tomorrow that door closes completely in my life. i will again have surgery i don't know why i have to face this trial again for the third time but i'm determined to find the reason. i know that everything has a purpose. the next couple weeks of my life are not going to be the easiest. i know that at times i'm going to feel like i've lost everything. but i hope that i can look back at this and know that it is blessing me. with this i say to anyone struggling with any door that is closing or any tough time to know that you are not alone. i bear my testimony of the power of prayer. it can help you so much and it can make the worst of days seem bright. life isn't always easy and if it was life just wouldn't be any fun. i know the priesthood was put on this earth for us. it has been such a blessing in my life and i'm so grateful i have it in my home. lastly to anyone that feels lost always know that heavenly father is always there for you. he doesn't like to see us suffer just as much as we don't like to go through it. but he only does it because he loves us and wants us to be able to live with him again. which if you put it in perspective is the greatest blessing of all so hang in there and he will bless you!
| Footprints in the Sand |
| One night I dreamed I was walking along the beach with the Lord. |
| Many scenes from my life flashed across the sky. |
| In each scene I noticed footprints in the sand. |
| Sometimes there were two sets of footprints, |
| other times there were one set of footprints. |
| This bothered me because I noticed |
| that during the low periods of my life, |
| when I was suffering from |
| anguish, sorrow or defeat, |
| I could see only one set of footprints. |
| So I said to the Lord, |
| "You promised me Lord, |
| that if I followed you, |
| you would walk with me always. |
| But I have noticed that during |
| the most trying periods of my life |
| there have only been one |
| set of footprints in the sand. |
| Why, when I needed you most, |
| you have not been there for me?" |
| The Lord replied, |
| "The times when you have |
| seen only one set of footprints, |
| is when I carried you." |
| Mary Stevenson |
No comments:
Post a Comment